Don’t ask for what is already yours

I love this quote.  It means that everything you ever desire is already yours. It is waiting for you to meet up with it.  I think the rest of the quote goes something like, instead spend your time being grateful for it. Prepare yourself mentally, physically, emotionally for its arrival.  I love this.  And I often loose sight of it. I think somehow I have to always ask for things, yet in the asking focus on the lack of my desires rather than the presence.  Back in my forties I became acutely aware of this.  I spent much time asking for my desires to be granted and irritated that they were taking so long.  I wanted more money, more success as an artist. I wanted to build my house, create my business, have exhibitions that were fun to host, I wanted more people to visit my studio, to buy my art. I wanted to be fitter. I wanted to buy clothes from my favourite designers, I wanted a ski pass for the winter and a fishing boat for the summer. I wanted a house big enough to have friends to stay as long as they liked.  The desire for these things was strong and the gap from having them was large.  I hadn’t much experience in those days of bridging that gap.  My faith was still weak.  My power with that muscle was underdeveloped.  If I can pin the last ten or so years on learning anything, it is the mastery of bridging the gap between desire and creation.  As they promise in the course of mircles, when you become at one with the energy that unites us all, you merely have to have a glimmer of desire and the powers of creation will fall into place for you.  I’ve had so many experiences with this.  If first happened before I met G.  I had been asking til I was blue in the face for a relationship.  I preyed, I asked my friends what I needed to change.  Was there something I needed to do, to fix, to be.  And one day I stopped asking and started believing he was on his way.  I slept well.  I ate well.  I enjoyed my singleness for I knew my days were numbered.  He was not the first may I met after I had the knowing, but he was the second.  And once I did meet him I had to get over all the barriers I had built against being single in order for the relationship to work, but work it did.  The next major knowing I had, where I stopped asking, stopped hoping and knew it was on its way was success with my art.  I stopped being anxious.  I stopped comparing myself to other artists.  I become joyous with my work again.  I started painting with gusto because I knew the owners of the paintings were on their way.  I felt love and inspiration when I walked into my studio.  I let go of seeking to change, looking to fix what was broken, either within or without of myself and became an artist.  I trusted, totally.  It was a given and give it did.  Today I have a thriving art practice.  People come for my paintings from all around the world.  I paint everyday and feel grateful these days for the days when I struggled.  Its given me compassion.  It stopped me from resting on my laurels.  And it certain stopped me from being the arrogant painter I was when I first experienced success.

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