a new day…

I started my winners bible back in 2010.  I hated the name, and in actual fact I still don’t like the name much, sort of a mixture between evangalical and Tony Robbins, but I’ve come to understand the name to be important.  These days, instead of that somewhat cynical view of the name it feels much more practical to me.  I couldn’t find anything better than saying its my guide, my tomb for all the things I want to create.  Maybe I could have called it Emma’s creation bible, but then, well, the problem with that speaks for itself.  So Emma’s winners bible stuck and now its still going.  I change it regularly.  Updating the goals as I achieve them, changing photos of people as them become important or less important, changing my strengths and weaknesses as they change.  I remember back when I started my goals were around getting my art practice up and running. About getting a fully sponored art show with three or four artists off the ground.  I strugled for years to do that.  Stopping and started.  Having limited success.  And then I got really clear about it in my winner’s bible, started visualing it everyday and it just came about easily and effortlessly.  It didn’t mean I had to do lots and extend myself and take opporuntities, but it was like I just didn’t see the opportunties before.  I was always facing the other way.  I think the visualisation and the realisation that I needed other people around me to help got me going.  And while I always had other people around me they weren’t the right people, I was too hasty in my choices.  I wasn’t clear enough about what I wanted.  Its a gorgeous thing to look back on.  The early days of the unfolding of those exhibitions.  It was like the time just became right and I stepped into it.  A venue became clear and sponsor became clear and the world welcomed it in.  I would stand in front of my canvases painting for that show and feel the paintings pouring out of me.  I could literally feel them waiting to be painted, it was a very exciting time.  Those paintings are now famous.  They have been repoduced in several reproductions and whenever people talk about NZ Art on a world stage those paintings are often cited.  Very cool times.  Anne-Marie, Jane and Alison were there too. There paintings are also famous and used in the same way.  It was exciting times for all of us back then.  Finding our feet.  Becoming comfortable with who we were. Sometimes at night, just as I’m going to bed I look around me at what I’ve created.  A house I feel so proud of.  My relationship with Graeme, who is the love of my life.  My daughter who I couldn’t love with more verocity.  My art work all over the world.  My Speedrenting business having changed the world. A body that is slim and effortlessly full of energy and vitality.  And I know that I created it all.  I believed in god working through me.  I paid attention to myself and to others and I created all those things  And then I turn my mind to what I’m creating now.  A best selling book.  I already have a publisher.  A art history degree.  I’m going back to studying.  And many, many holidays and gathering with friends and family.  I must be the most blessed person on earth.

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