A created life…

Being 50.  Its the new 40.  Really.  My body has never been trimmer or fitter or faster or recovered better.  But better than that. Way better than that, is my mind.  Sharper, happier, contenter if there is such a word and way, way, way more peaceful.  I sleep like a baby, I wake like a baby, full of vim and vigour. I can’t remember the last time I had a headache. Converserly my mind is clear and feels good.  I write every morning, like I have for years.  I use a mac, always have, probably always will.  I take my omega 3s, drink my smoothie and do a quick vizualisation.  It sets me up for a life that I am at the helm of.  Not in the control sense, I don’t believe we can control much, but we can gently follow a path.  We can have a point of view of where we want to be and steer in that direction.  We can’t control if there are mountains to cross or rivers to ford, but we can keep an eye on the horizon and steadfastly go in that direction.  And without knowing which horizon we are headed toward life becomes very hap hapharzed and in my experience life feels very out of control. Like we have no power over ourselves.  So I like to get up each morning and write about which star I’m heading towards.  I’ve done it for years and I believe I’ll keep doing it for years.  I like what I’m working on now that I’m 50.  I’ve always seen myself as a writer that will make a difference to millions of poeple.  I’ve never had the clarity to see what that difference is, but now that I’m 50 it is crystal clear to me. I’m writing, not just for myself each morning, but on my book.  I love feeling the words flow out of me. I love grabbing them as they are offered up to me.  I can emerse myself for a long time in the those words.  They fill me up and move me to greater things.  They fill me in the same way that my painting fills me.  My exhibitions over the years have been an extraordinary sense of satisfaction as I see the joy and excitment in peoples faces.  I love that they feel excited to have one of my paintings.  Its like a warm glow. Knowing that they will look at the work for years to come and get a sense of who they are from it, or at least that is what people tell me. My art reminds them to live a good life.  To always look for the good in the jornery.  To remember we are at the helm.  That we cannot dictate the cireumstances, but we can make choices in the face of them.  I love that my painting, and other peoples painting for that matter could touch people as much as it did.  I loved it when I started my own collection.  I have over 35 paintings at the moment of other artists.  It all started with a painting I got from Rob Cherry, then a painting I swapped from buying Anne-Marie Jeans wedding dress and then a straight painting swap with Jane Blackmore.  I love those pieces.  I loved them from the start and still love them.  And I love all the others I’ve bought and swapped along the way.  I love that I can have paintings on my walls and keep changing them.  They bring energy and light and stories to my walls.  And I feel very humble knowing that I have been offered along the way opportunities to be part of other poeples lives in the same way.

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